EFT Emotional Freedom Techniques Article
Relationships Help With EFT
by Silvia Hartmann
Overcoming Negative Emotions And
Feelings
In And About Relationships
With EFT Emotional Freedom Techniques
Release Jealousy, Irritation, Love Pain, Fear Of Commitment, Conflicting
Feelings, Insecurity, Low Self Esteem, Fear of Rejection, Anger, Sadness,
Bereavement and Depression And Set Yourself Free!
Welcome, and first things first.
You have followed a link that promised a technique to change yourself OR change
another, and that it works like magic.
You might not believe it quite yet, but it's actually true.
I'm going to show you a simple Energy Therapy (meridian based) called EFT (short
for Emotional Freedom Techniques) which is going to help you with your
relationship problems, social phobias, commitment problems, .and other types of
relationship based negative emotions including love pain, jealousy and
bereavement.
I, by the way, am Silvia Hartmann, a hypnotherapist and neuro-semanticist from
the United Kingdom. I didn't invent this technique, a very nice man called Gary
Craig from the US gets the honours for that, but it has helped me and my own
friends, family and clients so much that I do what I can to spread the word.
Let's get right to it and look at the five things you need to know to make this
work for you:
1. Releasing Ourselves from The Stranglehold of Emotions
At the core and center of all relationship problems lie strong and overwhelming
emotions such as fear, low self esteem, unpleasant emotions such as jealousy,
feeling abandoned, feeling hurt, feeling unlovable, feeling trapped, feeling
desperate, feeling unloved.
If there weren't any emotions involved, there wouldn't be such a thing as a
relationship problem at all - this is important to note and to remember.
After all, if a single man wasn't afraid of rejection and the painful emotions
this creates, he could just chat up one woman after another, 40 a night, every
night, until one finally said "Yes please!"
If a battered woman wasn't low, depressed, unhappy, scared, and worst of all,
probably still in love with the guy in question, she would probably be able to
pick up and leave.
So first of all, sit back for a moment and consider what the worst problem are
(or the things that cause you to feel the worst, to use different words) and
either write it down or make a mental note. I've put the probable corresponding
emotions in brackets, but it's the statements that count. Do this now.
Examples could be:
He is driving me crazy with his womanizing (anger!)
I can't stand her company any more (repulsion, rejection)
She doesn't even know that I exist (sadness, anger, helplessness)
I'm sure he's having an affair (fear, terror, anxiety, panic)
I don't trust her anymore (hurt, anger)
This relationship is killing me (depression, sadness, fear)
2. Use The Technique
Pick the worst of those statements to now try out if our wonderful Emotional
Freedom Technique works for you. The instructions are on the next page, but
whilst we're still here, a quick word about its effectiveness. In the general
population (ie not hospitalized or imprisoned folk) this works first time for
about 85% of people. The rest need more perseverance and it will work
eventually. It's easy to do and good for you. And it's free. So now go to the
treatment page and try this out for yourself to see how much better you can feel
about your problems, then come back and read the rest of this article.
3. What Happens Next
When you can remove bad feelings, two things happen. The first is that your body
says, "Thank you VERY much!" and you're less likely to be suffering from
headaches, heart attacks, skin rashes, sleeplessness and all kinds of other
problems.
The second thing is that you get to think clearly again. This is especially
important when there are decisions to be made, such as should I continue with
this relationship, or should I get out and start afresh? That's not all though.
When your inborn common sense can get to work and is no longer overwhelmed by
all these overpowering emotions, you can often also find that new ideas turn up,
different ideas as to how you can deal with the situation before you.
4. Magic By Proxy
Now the magic part - how to change another. By accident, it was discovered that
by doing the energy balancing on yourself, you can somehow affect others. Now
don't ask me how, what or why, I don't know, but I do know it works.
It was invented or discovered by a mother who was sitting by the incubator of
her tiny premature baby and who had been told that the child would not survive
the night. She was a therapist, absolutely distraught and used the EFT technique
to calm herself. As she tapped, the baby began to move a little, then its colour
changed and it did not die. The mother was convinced that it was her tapping
that had somehow created the change in the baby, and "Proxy Tapping" was born.
I've used it, like tens of thousands of others by now, and it really works much
better than distant healing - it's like something real is going on that we just
can't explain yet.
You can turn to this page for full instructions on how to do Proxy EFT.
You don't have to believe that it works, by the way. Just do it for a couple of
days and notice the results!
5. Beliefs About The World
You can just treat your relationship pains with EFT and all is well. However,
you can use it for more than that.
For examples, beliefs such as, "All men are bastards" have a nasty habit of
becoming absolutely true for those who believe it, whilst the nice men pair off
with the women who believe that "I will find a nice man who loves me and makes
me feel wonderful at every street corner!".
Similarly, beliefs such as "Nobody loves me", "I'm too ugly to be lovable",
"I'll never find a decent partner", "Only model perfect people can have a lover"
and so forth are superb reality creators as well as being very very depressing
to ponder on at any length.
You can change these beliefs with EFT just as well as you can release bad
feelings, because these are linked with feeling bad.
6. Conflicting Emotions - Being Torn Apart
One of the worst types of emotions in relationships is being torn between love
and hate, anger and forgiveness, fear and longing and any combination of
feelings you can imagine.
You can use EFT to make peace between parts of you that are pulling you in
opposite directions by using double statements with an "and" connection to
express the conflict you are feeling, such as:
"Being with her is destroying me AND I cannot live without her."
"I want to leave him AND he is the father of our children who need him."
"I love her AND I despise her."
"I want him AND I hate myself for it."
"I want to stand up to her AND there is nothing I can do."
If you find the "and" connection a little strained, you can say "but" instead;
the main thing is that both the conflict partners are together in one sentence
to release the feeling of see-sawing from one thing to the other or of feeling
like you are tearing apart under the strain.
You can use more than two conflicting statements in one sentence if you need to
when you do the tapping, as well.
6. Good Luck!
Ok, so there you have it. I hope you'll use this wonderful thing, and remember
to tell people you like about it too. If you would like to know more about EFT
and how to use it with just about everything from weight loss to money problems,
I've written a book called "Adventures In EFT" you might find useful , helpful
and interesting (costs about 25 dollars).
You can find out more about EFT and links to other sites by going to
http://www.123eft.com where you can also download a full explanation and EFT
protocol.
Remember to visit
http://www.theamt.com for many more links to the Energy Therapies community
and many articles and free downloads.
Good luck and all the best to you!
The Complete files are on
http://starfields.org/Relationships/
© Silvia Hartmann 2000
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